Kilig

I remember it like it was yesterday, the day you came back.

It was a typical December night for Ottawa. The cold air prickled against my cheeks and nose, the only part of my body left unbundled. The sky had fallen to complete darkness by dinner time, but I remember the way the snowflakes sparkled as they fluttered past the street lamps ever so softly. I recall leaving my apartment on Riverside that evening with butterflies in my stomach. I walked in silence down the road to the bus station that would bring me to you, my heart hammering in my chest and the butterflies not letting up for even a moment. 3 months time and 3,000 miles had kept us apart, but finally I could have you once more. Our future wasn’t clear but I didn’t care, it was our night.

The 25 minute ride on the 97-Airport bus felt like a lifetime, but every stop lessened the distance between us a little more. I had never been to the Ottawa Airport before, and I was so nervous about missing my stop that I got off a stop too soon and had a 10 minute walk to Arrivals. Sometimes love is so inexplicably powerful that it takes over your entire being. Darkness surrounded me but the glow of the airport in the distance pulled me forward. I didn’t feel frightened by my new surroundings, nor cold from the relentless winter. People always talk about that moment when you realize someone is the one. This evening was the moment I knew. Love doesn’t need explanation, it cannot always be rationalized. Love was my driving force that evening, and it pulsed through my being with unquestionable vehement.

 

I remember scoring a leather massage chair next to baggage claim but I couldn’t sit still. The butterflies had expanded their real estate and taken over my entire body. I paced anxiously, questioning the route of my nerves. I checked the time on my phone as I counted down the minutes to your scheduled arrival. 3 months isn’t a long time but it equates to a lifetime when you’re without the one you love. What if’s started plaguing my mind. What if I’m not who he remembers me to be? What if it doesn’t work out? What if he leaves again? What if…What if…

 

But then, when I noticed you in the distance, my doubts were silenced. I could feel your signature ear-to-ear smile even though you were still 100 yards away. Everything around us seemed to blur as I started walking, and then running towards you. Nothing mattered anymore. I didn’t care who was looking as I jumped into your arms and wrapped my legs around your waist. Tears were falling from our eyes as we laughed and kissed and touched and reunited. I could have held on to you for forever in that very moment.


Inspired by the Filipino word Kilig –Written in response to the daily Filipino word prompt for Word High July

 

 

 

Advertisements

Simplicity

The simplicity of your happiness reigns over my darkest days,

And while I’ve taught you to sit and stay, you’ve taught me of unconditional love.

I question whether man is worthy of such a companion,

When we are sad about yesterday and worried about tomorrow,

You find the joy in today.

Thank you, Marley, for teaching me to be present.

marley
In Action, photo credit: Trhippie

Inspired by the Daily Post’s daily prompt, simplicity.

Let’s Have Coffee

If we were having coffee on this rainy Sunday afternoon, we could curl up on the couch in my tiny 400 square-foot apartment. I don’t have people over very often, as I lack sufficient space for entertaining, but my coffee is most enjoyed at home.

I’d serve your coffee in my second favourite mug, otherwise known as the “love mug”. This mug is adorned with quotes of love by the world’s greatest writers:

Love comforteth like sunshine after rain. – Shakespeare.

That love is all there is, is all we know of love. – Emily Dickinson.

Love conquers All. – Virgil.

always have my coffee in my Spice Girls mug, a mug I’ve held close to my heart for almost 10 years.

Why Spice Girls, you may ask? Why a love mug? Let me explain.

As a young girl I loved the Spice Girls. Everything I had was Spice Girls. I had everything from the pencil case with a matching plastic backpack, the Spice Girl barbie doll collection, I even opted for the 5¢ Spice Girl gum that came with either a sticker or, even better, a temporary tattoo. When my friends and I would play “Spice Girls”, I was always Sporty Spice. They were a huge part of my childhood.

When the Girls reunited for their reunion tour I was around 15 years old, and I couldn’t afford a ticket to go. I was pretty devastated at the time, my feelings of nostalgia resurfacing. My great friend Lauren was lucky enough to attend the concert, and when she came to school the next day, she surprised me with the Spice Girls mug. Ten years later, I use this mug religiously. Although Lauren and I are separated by thousands of kilometres now, I remind her via pictures how much I still use this mug. I’m so protective of it, I don’t let anyone else use it. Maybe I’m a little crazy, but it’s one of the most thoughtful and most used gifts I’ve ever been given.

As for the love mug you’re currently sipping your coffee out of, its origin story is one of “one man’s junk is another (wo)man’s treasure.”

The summer before university I had been volunteering at an animal rescue shelter that doubled as a second hand shop in the small town of Lakefield, ON. The proceeds from the sales were used to provide food and care for the cats they rescued. One day as I was sorting through boxes of donated items, I came across the love mug. As a lover of literature and the power of love, I just had to have it. What made it even more special was that it had a previous life before it came into my hands. Someone once enjoyed their coffee from this very mug, and rather than toss it out when it lost its novelty, they donated it to a special cause. When it came into my possession it lacked perfection, the hint of old coffee stains left behind, scratches through the hearts surrounding its base. I embrace its imperfections, and I’m glad it’s one of the few possessions of mine that made it across the country with me.

Screen shot 2016-05-29 at 11.38.12 AM

Do you have a sacred mug? What’s its origin story? I’d love to know. Happy Sunday fellow bloggers. 🙂


Inspired by #weekendcoffeeshare. What would you say if we were having coffee?

Featured image by my talented partner, Thrippie

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Reality of Dreaming

I was sitting on the couch by your side when the ground began shaking. A surge of panic rushed through me as I jumped to my feet, and when I turned to look your way, you were gone. The ground began rumbling again, only this time louder and more intense.

As I studied my surroundings I realized they were foreign to me. This isn’t my home, where am I?! The details of the apartment were minimal, defined only by its stark white walls and concrete floors. It was cold and unwelcoming and we needed to get out of here. Suddenly a loud CCCRAACK ripped through the walls of our faux-home, and I began screaming your name.

Except whenever I tried screaming your name, nothing came out.

I ran through the hole-in-the-wall to find myself in the middle of downtown Vancouver. I knew it to be Vancouver but I was lost amidst the chaos of people. I didn’t understand what was going on but one thing was evident: they were all running in the same direction. When I turned to look behind me, large groups of tornadoes were obliterating everything in their paths. The city around me is being ripped apart and I just need to find you.

I see you in the distance but you’re walking away from me. I began shoving everyone to the side as I ran towards you, and that’s when I noticed Marley’s tail wagging next to you. I need to just reach you both, I need to feel safe again. Our world is crumbling around us and I’m not even with you. Please just turn around and hold me until it’s over. I collapse to the ground and squeeze my eyes shut until it all ends. I can’t bear the weight of this alone.


When I opened my eyes I found myself in my bed in a cold sweat. The tornadoes were gone but the loneliness lingered. My head ached from clenching my jaw and my heart hurt as though I had just lost everything.

Whether or not you believe in analyzing dreams, I believe dreams of this magnitude don’t simply occur without cause.

It’s not the tornadoes themselves that I fear, it’s what they materialized out of.

Inner anguish, stress, confusion?

Why was it tearing apart my life so rapidly and leaving me alone to endure its wrath?

I take it as a subconscious cry for help.

The next day, I faced my inner demons. No longer will I endure pain of that magnitude, both in my dreams and reality.

 

Inspired by The Daily Post’s daily word prompt, Dream. 

Feature image of Vancouver at night by my talented partner, TrHippie